To the island of Shakespeare, where energy companies ring 400% profits, and energy consumers are reduced to ringing Jeremy Vine. In the home of blank verse, nobody can afford to use a meter.
As Liz Truss prepares to take charge, and distances herself from the administration she administrated by remaining relentlessly focused on turbocharging us with meaningless banalities, it seems quaint that Brexit was once thought the island’s nadir.
Beneath the burning skies of climate Armageddon, with the inflationary graph standing to attention quicker than a Johnson at an IT lesson, it’s looking increasingly unlikely that it will be enough to cosplay Margaret Thatcher while ‘delivering levelling up’.
While debating (sic) Rishi, she suggested that sea-level rises could be arrested with more domestic recycling. Remembering to put your Sanatogen tub in the blue bin might be what the SUV-reliant Toby carvery-visiting faithful want to hear, but evidence that we’re on course for a minimum rise of 2 degrees says otherwise.
Ignoring the science is the new following the science, and for a caste obsessed with empire, the Tories remain remarkably resilient to empirical data. Once again they’re waiting for the invisible hand of the market, the one that’s so good at opening foodbanks and lining lobbyists’ pockets, to come to the rescue. So don’t hold your breath. Unless you’re choking on CO 2.
These class-ridden Empiricists care little for the forgotten nations, like PNG, on the front line of anthropogenic apocalypse. Surviving on subsistence agriculture during a drought takes a spiritual toll too. So perhaps if we showed them how to harvest their crops and collect their rainwater they might be a bit friendlier.
It is often heard on Twitter, the natural home of recycled material, that ‘It’s the satirists you feel sorry for.’ You shouldn’t. Shooting fish in a barrel is not a noble pastime when you are a complicit participant in a democracy – the birthplace of Newtonian physics no less – that is now likely to be led by a woman so dense that light bends around her.
One day, the archaeologists of another civilisation will dig up the choked remains of this one. They won’t be feeling any sympathy either.”
I first read this from the Twitter post here – @ladybie11
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